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 Post subject: Re: Favorite jokes
PostPosted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 1:40 am 
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Joined: Wed Jan 02, 2008 8:15 pm
Posts: 3783
Location: London, England
:mrgreen:

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14th December 2005 - One Sweet Dream came true today


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 Post subject: Re: Favorite jokes
PostPosted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 2:58 pm 
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Words Are Flowing Out...
Words Are Flowing Out...
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Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 3:33 pm
Posts: 1509
Location: At The beach In Southern California
Californians (I'm a native here so here ya go from everywhere else)




So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes, somebody had to come up with this,

you know you're from California if:




1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.



2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.



3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.



4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.



5. You can't remember . . is pot illegal?



6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.



7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and
Ethiopian.



8. You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?



9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.



10. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.



11. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS
George Clooney.



12. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.



13. You can't remember . . .is pot illegal?



14. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH."



15. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or pagers.



16. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.



17. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????



18. Both you AND your dog have therapists, psychics, personal trainers and cosmetic surgeons.



19. The Terminator is your governor.



20. If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license. If you're here illegally, they want to give you
one.

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Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it.
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 Post subject: Re: Favorite jokes
PostPosted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 4:45 pm 
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Words Are Flowing Out...
Words Are Flowing Out...
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Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 3:33 pm
Posts: 1509
Location: At The beach In Southern California
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.


"Mom", he asked, "Are these my brains?"
"Not yet", she replied.

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Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it.
John Lennon


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 Post subject: Re: Favorite jokes
PostPosted: Sat Apr 25, 2009 11:26 pm 
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While My Guitar Gently Geeks
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Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:05 pm
Posts: 2212
Location: Back in the USSR...
How do you get a champagne cork back in its bottle?

Ask a spurs fan.

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Reporter: Did you have a chance to get away from each other on your trip to the USA?
George: Yeah.
Ringo: He got away from me - twice!

Reporter: Do you enjoy press conferences?
John: Yes, depending on the intelligence of the questions.

Reporter: What do you think you've contributed to the musical field?
Ringo: Records.


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 Post subject: Re: Favorite jokes
PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 4:50 pm 
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Words Are Flowing Out...
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Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 3:33 pm
Posts: 1509
Location: At The beach In Southern California
Something To Ponder

Fawcett Had it with majors & Jackson had it with minors.

Ummm.

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Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it.
John Lennon


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